I’ve been feeling self-conscious over my disappearance from here again, lately. I managed to keep up a relatively regular, three-times-a-week schedule for years, and then… I just didn’t. And I’ve been feeling anxious about it, to no small degree; anxious enough to stop myself from returning, if nothing else. I’m a professional writer, after all — words are my business — so what happened? How did I manage to stop writing for myself for six weeks, or however long it was since I’ve last been here…?
The truth is, I start to get tired of the words. Being a staff writer for Popverse is a wonderful thing, but it’s also a heavier work schedule than I’ve had in years — as a freelancer, I’d shaped my week into four work days pretty deliberately, and now I’m doing five days a week from 8am through 5pm — with a weekly (in theory) Wired column on top of that. For much of the time, it was Wired that I let slide — there’s about five or six columns I just didn’t even pitch, because my brain was too full of Popverse stuff — but the combination of guilt over missed deadlines and remembering how well Wired pays kicked in and brought me back into that fold… but it meant that something else had to go. So, the blog went dark.
It’s been in the back of my mind this entire time, though. Especially in the last week, as Twitter has started to be stripped for parts and people have been talking about returning to blogs en masse. So… here I am, wondering how to find the balance between everything that allows me to keep going without putting too much pressure on myself, or letting myself get tired of the words again.
Expect less regular posting, but continued posting, might be the answer. Shorter posts, more random posts. Or not…? Just know that, even if (when) things go quiet here, I’m wishing I had more words to share.