Reading The Tea Leaves For Real

I’ve recently decided that I should look into reading tea leaves. This isn’t a joke, as much as a passing thought; I’ve been drinking loose-leaf tea for months, and always have leaves left at the bottom of the cup, so I figure maybe the fates are trying to tell me something that I’ve been missing out on all this time. The Internet tells me that it’s called “tasseography,” or even more excitingly “tasseomancy,” and that seems like something I would happily claim as a part-time career. “What do you do for a living?” “Oh, I’m a writer, but on the side I dabble in tasseomancy.”