Something unexpected happened at San Diego Comic-Con that I’ve been mulling over in the back of my head ever since: someone offered me a job, and it’s not a job in a field I’ve ever worked in before. No, I won’t say what it is, nor who offered it to me; I said no almost immediately, responding that I didn’t have the skill set — they disagreed — nor the experience required for the precise position they were offering, and I was at least entirely correct when it came to the experience part. However… I keep thinking about the fact that it was offered, and I immediately turned it down.
I don’t say that because I regret turning it down (I don’t), but because the more I think about it, the more I’m fascinated by the fact that I didn’t at least take longer to think about the possibility. If nothing else, to think about the possibility of doing anything so outside of my comfort zone. (And this very much would have been outside of my comfort zone.)
When I first moved to the US and got my Green Card, I remember meeting with a temp staffing agency purely because I needed money fast and I didn’t feel as if I had any particularly marketable skills. Sure, I’d gone to art school and taught in that same art school for a couple years after, but still: art school, you know? In the meeting, I was asked what kind of work I was looking for, and my reply was, for all intents and purposes, what have you got?
My thinking at the time was, no matter what is offered, I’ll either pick it up as I go along or not, and then I’ll move on to something else. Looking back, this feels supernaturally unlike the me I am now, who’d be daunted at the prospect of starting from scratch and seeing what could happen — but it worked out, even if much of that was due to the kindness and forgiveness of those around me at the time. (Something I have always strived to repay and pass on now that I’m in a more senior position myself.) Still: was I selling myself short by not responding to this new job offer with a do tell me more instead of a no, I’m not the guy, trust me?
I don’t know. Maybe? It’s not as if I’m in a business with any kind of long-term survival strategy, because my business doesn’t have any kind of long-term survival strategy, it becomes increasingly clear. Then again, it’s also not as if the industry I was being offered an entry point to was any more stable in the grand scheme of things. I chose to stay with the Devil I Know, and honestly, I’m glad I did. I actually kind of like this particular Devil, if I have to say it out loud.
And yet, my mind keeps wondering every now and then. And yet.